The Cult of Social Media
Five Social Media Mantra that We All Know and Love:
As I read the popular Social Media Mantra every day there are five recurring themes that are always popping up. So I thought I would share them with you today so that we may all be enlightened. I hope this helps you as much as it has helped me to unravel the mysteries of social networking.
- First and foremost, you must be a mindless drone (a very simple but important concept to understand from which all others will follow). I don’t mean that in a negative way (of course) but it sure helps in getting along, don’t you think.
- Always be nice and polite no matter what. Show us that smiley face, put your best foot forward and remember, don’t worry .. be happy.
- Even if you feel like crap or can’t stand your online friends, please keep it to yourself because we don’t want any negativism here. There is a zero tolerance policy for bad attitudes and you will be weeded out with extreme prejudice. Remember — snark is bad, so beware.
- Never (ever) contradict your betters or you will be shunned. By your “betters” I mean your social media mentors whom you
suck up toadore and hope to get their attention. After all, they know ‘better’ don’t they. (Yes, it is rhetorical.)
- Pay homage to your Guru (perhaps the most important social media mantra of all). Give him or her your unconditional love and support because after all, they are your gravy train (or at least you hope they will be).
So won’t you please join my
cult um, social network. I promise not to lord it over you … too much.
Thanks, from your friendly neighborhood guru (hint) BLOGBloke. Have I missed anything? I know .. I’m bad.
Disclaimer: I shouldn’t have to mention this but for those who have thin skins please note this post is from the BLOGBloke satire category. So don’t be offended. It’s meant to be fun and remember the spirit in which it is intended. Thanks, and I do hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it.